To Be With Child

On a physical level pregnancy is healing, as the baby’s fetal cells actually “repair and rejuvenate” the mother throughout pregnancy and the rest of her life. But there is something healing about carrying your husband’s baby that goes beyond the physical. There’s an intimacy felt that is not felt otherwise.

We are happier. I rely on my husband and appreciate him more. He helps me more and takes extra care of the household. We are also quicker to forgive one another’s shortcoming. To overlook them, not to make them more than what they are and work together.

Sometimes I sense him smiling at me- and a feeling of satisfaction sweeps over. I suppose husbands find their expecting wives rather endearing.  Maybe it’s because pregnancy seems to bring out that feminine quality, that satisfaction of  being. I think men are captivated by this since it’s so different from their own masculine experience of becoming, of constantly providing for the family and proving himself a man. . . Whatever it is, I am enjoying it.

 

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10 comments

  1. “On a physical level pregnancy is healing, as the baby’s fetal cells actually “repair and rejuvenate” the mother throughout pregnancy and the rest of her life.”

    i did not know this. both my pregnancies were so physically hard on me that, though thankful i could get pregnant and carry my babies to term, by the time i’d delivered my 2nd, my body was shot 😦

    i envy those women, like you, whose pregnancies aren’t like that 🙂

    1. Mine are usually uncomplicated except for terrible morning sickness that lasts 24/7 for 7 months. But I don’t have that this time around! So it’s much easier to just enjoy it.

  2. You write well, so I can “understand” what you mean.
    Feel this watching my wife sew; something I can’t do well. Sexual genetic difference.
    I also feel it hauling/spitting wood with a maul around my wife, again she simply can’t do it.

  3. This is beautifully put, and very true in my experience.
    Our children are 7, 6, 4, 3, 3, and 19 months but we are both really feeling the pull to conceive again. We were talking about it last month at “that” time. My husband says it’s very fulfilling for him to see me carrying his child, the fruit of our love. I love being pregnant for that reason too, and also because I feel closer to him during that time-because our child is part of us both. I love thinking about the little person that is being knit in my womb and wondering how my husband’s and my features will combine this time. It’s always amazing to see us both, as well as the other children, in a perfect new little face.

    I am so glad to see a woman sharing that she has these thoughts, too. Nearly all the women of my acquaintance seem to revel in complaining through their whole pregnancies, as if pregnancy is a free pass to while and moan and groan for nine months. It depresses me. They’re missing out on so much beauty.

    1. pregnancy IS very beautiful. but for some of us, it’s also really, really hard. i was very ill with both in a myriad of ways. my husband didn’t act like yours at all. those were some hard days.

    2. I’ve just read your post and I think it’s absolutely beautiful. We only have 3 children and are praying for more. I know that lots of women struggle with pregnancy and I know not everyone can cope with a large family but I do think that in a perfect world to welcome your husband’s children into your womb as many times as God blesses us is what he intends.

  4. Ame, I believe you. I didn’t say pregnancy wasn’t hard for me! I’ve gotten very sick for months and lost over 15 lbs (I’m not overweight) with some pregnancies, and I get varicose veins and plenty of aches and pains, and have also experienced Intrahepatic Cholestasis of Pregnancy, which was pretty hellish. I know many women have gone through worse and I do have a high tolerance to pain. 🙂 I didn’t mean to belittle women who are going through rough pregnancies. I was thinking of women I know who had healthy, fairly easy pregnancies and seem to enjoy complaining about it with a “But I guess it’s worth it, right?” tacked lamely on the end. I didn’t mean to give offense. 🙂 Difficult pregnancies are a heavy cross to carry, and I am sorry to hear you have had such hard times. God bless you, sister.

  5. Emily, on your original comment, I’ve never heard it said better. Especially this part: It depresses me. They’re missing out on so much beauty. This should be our generation’s motto! Our primary sin is the “awesomeness” we freely give up.

    My husband says it’s very fulfilling for him to see me carrying his child

    It’s very strange. I’ve never thought about this (and after nearly double your child experience I feel silly to admit it). To me it’s just natural. To be human, part of life. The hard vs fulfilling? Just a yawn; every rose has its thorn and all that. Even assuming the bare minimum, being a naked ape caught in this mortal coil, children and birth are an obvious part of being fully human (outside of being a monk or hermit or even just hanging myself in protest). And the more children, the better. This is a no-brainer. I simply haven’t advanced very far past my pagan roots :-).

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