Authority is Paramount

at-home

I am enjoying the book Fascinating Womanhood. It is extremely helpful and I have found it a bit more applicable to me than Laura Doyle’s book the Surrendered Wife (also a very helpful read) I believe that is because Helen Andelin writes a bit more about children and family life:

A family is not a democracy, where everyone casts his vote. The family is a theocracy, where the father’s word is law. In the home the presiding authority is always vested in the father, and in all home affairs and family matters, no other authority is paramount. This arrangement is not arbitrary or unfair. It’s a matter of the law and order in the Kingdom of God.

This excerpt struck me:

You may tend to claim jurisdiction over your children, since you have given them life and are in charge of their daily care. You may feel the right to determine discipline, instruction, religious affiliation, and other important things. If you clash with your husband on these matters, you may feel an inalienable right to the final say. This is not so. Although you have the sacred responsibility of motherhood, you are not their leader. Your husband is the shepherd of his flock and in full command.

Although I do not undermine my husband’s authority by disagreeing with his disciplining methods and  try very hard to be a united front, I often have to fight the feeling of having an inalienable right to the final say when it comes to raising the children. This passage was rather eye opening for me. I am beginning to see many of my faults rather clearly now.

By The Hand of A Female

estherThen said the king unto her, What wilt thou, queen Esther? and what is thy request? it shall be even given thee to the half of the kingdom.
Esther 5:3

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Most blessed of women be Jael,
    the wife of Heber the Kenite,
    most blessed of tent-dwelling women.
 He asked for water, and she gave him milk;
    in a bowl fit for nobles she brought him curdled milk.
Her hand reached for the tent peg,
    her right hand for the workman’s hammer.
She struck Sisera, she crushed his head,
    she shattered and pierced his temple.
 At her feet he sank,
    he fell; there he lay.
At her feet he sank, he fell;
    where he sank, there he fell—dead.

Judges 5: 24-27

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Then she fell on her face and bowed herself to the ground, and said unto him, why have I found grace in thine eyes, that thou shouldest take knowledge of me, seeing I am a stranger? . . . And Boaz answered and said unto her, It hath fully been shewed me, all that thou hast done unto thy mother in law since the death of thine husband: and how thou hast left thy father and thy mother, and the land of thy nativity, and art come unto a people which thou knewest not heretofore.

Ruth 2:10-11

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Then her words pleased Holofernes and all his servants; and they marvelled at her wisdom, and said,
There is not such a woman from one end of the earth to the other, both for beauty of face, and wisdom of words.

Judith 11:20-21.

A Lesson in Detachment: Decluttering Books.

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I’ve been working hard on decluttering our house and am very pleased with the results. I got rid of a lot of books and even some rickety bookshelves! Getting rid of books has always been difficult for me, but they were getting out of hand. It was a great lesson in detachment going through the shelves and donating them. I am so glad I did though because I now have space for prayer, a little shrine on top our family bookshelf. I even have room to display some much loved pieces like the tea set, a wedding gift from my husband.

The Marriage of Mary and St. Joseph: an example to us all

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“The Mystical City Of God” by Venerable Mary of Agreda is a fascinating, devout, and mysterious read.  I was particularly  struck by the visions she had concerning Mary’s submission to her spouse, St. Joseph. Her obedience and submission is an example for all married women. Let us meditate on this passage and seek to imitate our Blessed Mother’s obedience and submission in our own marriage:

Mary Agreda’s vision of St. Joseph and Mary searching for lodgings in Bethlehem:

The most modest Queen followed her spouse through the crowds of people, while he went from house to house and from door to door. Although she knew that the hearts of the house of men were to be closed to them, and although to expose her state at her age to the public gaze was more painful to her modesty than their failure to procure night- lodging, She nevertheless wished to obey Saint Joseph and suffer this unmerited pain.

Another detail that hit me was when Mary spoke to St. Joseph she addressed him as, “My spouse and my Master.” Mary, the Mother of God, submitted herself to her earthly spouse. Let me repeat that. Mary, the Mother of God, submitted herself to her  earthly spouse.  She wanted to obey st. Joseph and she rejoiced in each opportunity she had to submit to his authority!

Let us reflect on her love and ask her to intercede for us as we try to imitate her great respect for her spouse.

Mary, Queen of patriarchs, pray for us!